By CAROLYN HAX (Adapted from a recent online discussion.)Dear Carolyn: I would like to understand how people make new friends when they are in their mid-50s. Where are they going, or what activities are they doing, to make and keep interesting friends? What’s the secret I have not learned? I believe I am flexible, adventurous, a good listener, creative, outgoing and fun. I am interested in their lives. I want to know: Why they chose the field they are in? Why they live in this area? What are their hobbies? Are politics important to them? What types of food do they like? I do not ask all these questions at once but over time to show interest in their lives. At the gym, people seem to be with people they know or working out by themselves. On group hikes, I have found people are with people they already know and do not seem to be interesting in adding to their circle of friends.-- Making FriendsHax: The older I get and the more relocations I have behind me, the more I believe habit … [Read more...] about Carolyn Hax: Is it just me or is it nearly impossible to make new friends after age 50?
How to meet new friends
Harriet Howard Heithaus Naples Daily News Published 12:00 PM EDT Oct 3, 2018 Even without the first note of music, 40 kids are seeing themselves in new ways through a new Collier County elementary school choir collaboration. "Let's think of ourselves as having little knobs in us. Now we're going to turn those knobs halfway up," Todd Peterson coaxed the group as they looked up from the pages of Andy Beck's "Riversong." It was the second melody they'd been rehearsing for their inaugural concert at noon Saturday , Oct. 6, (see information box) — and the one that would install volume knobs inside their psyches. Other songs, which ranged from African to Israeli to American and English tunes, would bring other concepts. To keep energized, youngsters engaged they were tasked with incorporating movements, such as rising every time the word "river" was sung. On their way to singing those melodies in concert at North Naples Church this … [Read more...] about Naples students meet new friends, new concepts in choir
COURTESY KRISTIN BURTON Donn Trenner’s formula for making friends is music, laughter and staying active. Lucille Simmons fills her days by splitting time between relatives and friends. Donn Trenner, 91, estimates that two-thirds of his friends are dead. “That’s a hard one for me,” he said. “I’ve lost a lot of people.” As baby boomers age, more and more folks will reach their 80s, 90s — and beyond. They will not only lose friends but face the daunting task of making new friends at an advanced age. Friendship in old age plays a critical role in health and well-being, according to recent findings from the Stanford Center on Longevity’s Sightlines Project. Socially isolated individuals face health risks comparable to those of smokers, and their mortality risk is twice that of obese individuals, the study notes. Baby boomers are more disengaged with their neighbors and even their loved ones than any other generation, said … [Read more...] about How to cultivate new friends as you age
Donn Trenner, 91, estimates that two-thirds of his friends are dead. “That’s a hard one for me,” he said. “I’ve lost a lot of people.” As we age, we not only lose friends, but face the daunting task of making new friends. And it turns out that friendship plays a critical role in health and well-being, according to recent findings from the Stanford Center on Longevity Sightlines Project. Socially isolated elders face health risks comparable to those of smokers, and their mortality risk is twice that of obese individuals, according to the study. Being disengaged from friends, family members and neighbors can make building new friendships even harder, said Laura Carstensen, director of the Stanford Center on Longevity. “If we’re disengaged, it’s going to be harder to make new friends,” she said. “Friendship is not to be taken for granted,” said Trenner, a pianist. “You have to invest in friendship.” Even … [Read more...] about How to make new friends as you lose the old
Moving to a city where you know no one is never easy. It is even harder if you are a recent college graduate and are leaving the comfort of a ready-made community to start your career with your first grown-up job. So how do you turn an unfamiliar place into one you can call home? There are easy ways to make the transition from stranger in a strange land to the leader of a (new) pack. You can leverage existing networks like fellow college alumni; use social media to meet others with common interests; throw yourself into tourist mode and explore; make friends with your co-workers; and, above all, say yes to every invitation you get. What do you have to lose? A time to leap When Jane Behre moved to Dallas in February, it was the first time she had ever set foot in the city. Her interviews for a production sound technician job at the Dallas Theater Center were all done by Skype. “While I’m still young, I will go where there is work,” said Behre, 22. “If … [Read more...] about Moving for a job? How to make a new city your home